Month: August 2014

“A Helping Hand”

My friend has been having electrical problems at her house and she says to me, “I ran into your dad the other day, he offered to come by and help.” “Oh really?” “Yeah, he’s such a nice man.”  “Yes, he is, he has a big heart.  You may, however, want to have an ambulance on standby, just in case you have to kick start it at some point.”

Yeah, he’s not real good with electrical stuff.  One time he went down to the basement to change a light bulb, the lights flickered and the next thing I know, Albert Einstein is standing in our living room.  Oh, don’t worry, I gave him a snickers bar and he was fine.  I think he even managed to figure out how to re-animate a corpse at one point.  Not a real comfortable situation for a thirteen year old at two o’clock in the morning when she sees her dead grandma at the foot of her bed.

Grandma: “Uhhh…”

“I love you too grandma, just don’t eat me.”

My grandma tried to eat me, that just sounds wrong on so many levels.  Then again, any conversation that starts with “I want to eat you.” can only go downhill from there.

“Dawn of the Dead (1978) & Dawn of the Dead (2004)

Last week I focused on “Smallville” and since the new season of “The Walking Dead” is about to begin, that is what I’m going to be focusing on this coming week, so I guess this is kind of a prelude.

As long as I can remember I’ve been a big fan of ‘zombie’ everything.  If a movie or television show has dead, zombie or plague in the title it’s pretty much a guarantee I’m going to check it out.

“George A. Romero” is one of my favorite writers and directors and “Dawn of the Dead” was one of the first zombie movies I ever saw, and I thought it would be a good idea to do a comparison between the two.  The 2004 version was not a remake of the original, but I enjoyed it for different reasons, with that being said they still have a few similarities, so we’ll break it down in bits and pieces.

dawn-of-the-dead-castdawn-of-the-dead-castNo zombie or post apocalypse type film or television show would be the same without a group of survivors who just look whipped.  I mean, I guess if I was constantly being chased by hordes of zombies, I’d look whipped too.

Of course, if I had a choice as to which zombies I’d want be stuck with during the apocalypse…

ZombiesThe drunken frat boys would be preferable. dawn-of-the-dead-2004-

 Each group managed to hole up in one of the best places to be stuck in if it’s the end of the world.  If you can find a mall and secure it, perfect. It’s got everything you need, right? The only problem is being stuck together in one place for a long period of time you start to get on each others’ nerves and something always happens forcing you to leave anyway.Romance

romanceTragedy also has a tendency to bring people closer together, sometimes feelings flair up and you become romantically involved, but as we all know, it always ends badly, either your significant other wants to eat you. (no pun intended), or they would rather blow their brains out than run risk of wanting to eat you.

imagesromance bad ending

Aside from the advancements in makeup and special effects, which weren’t bad in the 78 version, after all, they were created by “Tom Savini” who, in my opinion is one of the best in the business.  We’re going to take a look at the differences.

helicopter-zombieNow, the group in the older version had an advantage with the helicopter which, in some cases, may seA Team stylerve as a weapon for those pesky zombies.  I mean, if you need to leave in a hurry the best place to go is up, but the group in the new version pulled a complete “A-Team” maneuver. Did you see those trucks?  Awesome!Fat Lady

The director of the 2004 version managed to cast the ‘dead by dawn’ lady, which was cool in itself, but who can forget the cute little zombie baby.  You may want to rethink breast feeding.cute lil zombie baby

I think this is where I am going to end it.  I’m getting pissed off that the pictures aren’t going where I want them to go, so this post looks like crap, not a good thing for a ‘closet perfectionist.’  Might have to try other templates.

“Allison Mack as Chloe Sullivan”

I caHeat474n honestly say “Chloe Sullivan” was one of my favorite characters on “Smallville.”  She was adorable, smart, resourceful, tenacious and one of the most loyal friends “Clark Kent” ever had.  Despite the feelings she had for “Clark” and feeling the pain of pining for someone she knew in her heart she would never have,  she was always there for him and later on became his main sidekick.

I wish I had a tenth of “Chloe’s” character.  She had a lot of passion and she 1Chloe-Sullivan-Matrix episodewasn’t afraid to stick to her guns when she felt she was doing the right thing, even if she was being ‘crucified’ for it.  That takes a lot of guts and she had plenty of that, and who can forget the “Matrix” episode, or when they went into the future, she was bad-ass too.

Allison Mack“Allison Mack”, after looking at her blog makes me believe they knew what they were doing when they chose her for that role.   She’s quite a talented writer.  Check it out, not the ‘wall of weird’, but it’s very creative.

http://www.allisonmack.com/

 

 

“Who Wears the Pants in the Family?”

A husband and wife were arguing over where they were going for their tenth anniversary.  She wanted to go to the beach and he wanted to go to the mountains.

After much bickering, her husband grabbed a pair of his pants and handed them to her.  “Put these on.” he said.

“I can’t wear those,” she replied.  “they’re too big.”

“That’s right.  because I wear the pants in the family.”

In response, she took a pair of her panties and told him to put them on.

“I can’t get into those.” he said.

“That’s right, and if you want to get into them again, we’ll go to the beach.”

“My Issues with Clark Kent’s Girls”

Lana LangOkay, I’m officially annoyed.  I’m sitting here watching the second season of “Smallville” and it’s seriously pissing me off.

I thought when you loved someone, you accept them for who they are, faults and all, but I’m thinking about “Lana Lang” and “Chloe Sullivan”.  not so much “Chloe” as “Lana”.  I think at some point, even before “Chloe” truly found out his secret, she learned to accept “Clark”.  It’s ashamed too, because I think “Chloe” was a better fit for him anyway, so it’s not surprising he ended up with her cousin “Lois Lane”, who was a lot like “Chloe” in manysmallville-chloe ways.

“Lana” on the other hand, she was always blowing him off.  My take, “Clark” may not have always been there when you wanted him to be, but he was always there when you needed him to be.  How many times did “Clark” save “Lana” and “Chloe?”  Is it true, no matter how much good you do for someone, they always focus on the negative?  What’s up with that?

Look, I don’t care how many secrets you have, if you are pulling my ass out of a fire, or saving me from going ‘splat’ from a long fall time and again, I don’t care.  You don’t have to explain anything to me.  I’ll worship the ground you walk on.  I was always told never to sock a gift horse in the mouth.

My apologies to all “Lana Lang” and “Chloe Sullivan” fans.  I’m not saying I didn’t like them, as a matter of fact, I had a lot of respect for “Chloe” and in some ways even “Lana”.  I’m just venting.

“A Hard Lesson”

I used to put candles on my windowsill, not a smart thing to do, but I learned a valuable lesson.  Never underestimate a warm, summer breeze and a six pack of Bud or you may find yourself running around at three in the morning, throwing buckets of water on a wall of fire.