You totally deserved it. You tortured me.
What about the time you locked me in the basement with your brother after he ate half a dozen bean burritos. That, my friend, was torture. If I had lit a match the whole place would’ve gone up in flames.
I don’t remember that.
Of course you wouldn’t, you’re not the one who almost died from gas asphyxiation.
An old lady, after having cremated her husband, was dumping his ashes on the beach, but she took the last bit in the palm of her hand and blew it away.
When I asked her why, she turned to me and said. “I was just giving him the blowjob he always wanted.”